Lucy.

Hello readers

Hope you all are doing well.

The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over other.

-William James.

Once upon time near the foot hills of the Himalayas was a kid named Lucy.

She was born to a shepherd who was working for a land lord who was a pretty wealthy man who owned cattle, sheep and a dozen yaks.

Lucy lost her mother at a very young age so she was taken care by her dad,  who was a kind and empathetic person who realized that his kid should not feel the lack of her mother’s love and took care of her so well that she never felt the lack of her mom’s love. Her dad ensured that she would get educated as he did not want her to become just to work under someone like him and just earn enough bread to survive.

So Lucy went to a local convent which was a charity educational institute as she started learning her ABCs’, once the convent organized a donation campaign for beggars, so the teachers requested the students to get any old clothing and sundries at their place. So Lucy was very much determined to help for the cause so she asked her dad if there was anything that she could do.

Her dad was pretty happy with her concern and service minded attitude, he advised that since he had some surplus wool left with him for the year she could give it to her teachers who can decide how best it will be helpful.

But Lucy was unhappy that by just giving some wool it will be burden on her teachers to either knit them to make sweaters or the wool will go waste. She had a week of time before the donation program to start.

So she decided to learn knitting and make some sweaters. She took the help of her neighbor who was very dear to her and managed to knit 5 sweaters which were very too pretty look at.

The day the donation took place, Lucy’s teachers were surprised and asked her “My dear child who gave you these newly knit sweaters I know your dad is a kind man but why did he take so much pain to make this?” Lucy replied “My dear sister (Nuns are called as sister in convents) my dad gave me the wool and she smiled, then who knitted them? “Asked the sister, “I took the help of the granny who lives next door and knitted them” replied Lucy.

Her teacher was overwhelmed for the effort and concern Lucy put in to accomplish a task for the sake of society.

And from that day Lucy was known for her service-mindedness in school, which was once noticed by the head of infirmary in the church who gave a suggestion to her teachers “ she would be a fine doctor  if you ask me she has a godly touch I tell you”

Lucy grew up to be a young girl and looking into her interest in serving people  her teacher advised her to become a doctor.

Lucy was very happy and gladly said she will would become for sure.

After years of hard work Lucy graduated as a psychologist. Her dad was very happy and was proud that his little girl for her great achievement.

As the years rolled by when Lucy was progressing in her career, she decided she wanted to study more and opted to take up a specialization in frustration and stress management, another 2 long years of study and she became what she aimed for and setup her own clinic in Kolkata.

As the days passed by, the fame of her clinic grew in and around the city, Once she met a women who came to seek her help, her problem was that her best friend was showing a frustrated behavior and since she knew her for long that she was a kind hearted lady but suddenly she had started feeling un-rest and behaving in way that people don’t like, Lucy agreed to meet her friend and do her best.

Some days later her friend came to the clinic, and this is what happened:

“Hello, your friend Rita asked me to meet you how are you today?” the friend of Rita her name was Richa replied,” Hi doctor I am fine actually but,  she feels I have some issues and not mentally fit I wanted to prove her wrong so I decided to take a challenge hope you will don’t agree with her.”

Lucy smiled and replied “Oh miss Richa who said you are mentally unfit? You are as fit as a fiddle I just wanted to meet you as I heard you are a very good painter.

Stunned by the answer of the doctor Richa broke down in tears, Dr.Lucy understood the reason why she did so and just consoled her. From that day Richa became close to the doctor and gradually the family of Richa as well as her close friend were surprised her jolly behavior as before and the change which made her feel normal again.

They all thanked DR. Lucy for her great help and treatment which was given to Richa were eager to know how she cured her from her frustration habit.

This is what Lucy replied in the  “Richa is an artist inside,  she loves to paint  but due to her family pressures she was not able to follow her passion last time her dad, restricted her by not allowing to take part in a prestigious painting competition, there he sowed the seed for the neuro transmitter which promotes nerve impulses to trigger tension in the facial muscles which made her frown and her brain cells recorded this rejection and was in a traumatic state, but due to her maturity she managed herself. But the outbursts caused by the rejection and disappointment continued, when she came here we had long discussions on her likes and dislikes and the moment I uttered the word painting, as Rita had told me about her passion for painting she realized even though she had the talent she could not express it, so this made her feel helpless leading her to cry. I helped her to start painting again by giving certain biological schematics which I wanted as portrait!”

There ends the story, my take away from the  story is firstly how anyone can become whatever he wants in life. Example Lucy.

Secondly we all suffer from our frustrations some big and some small the important point is the small frustations become big at times and can be very harmful to the person and the people who is living with him or her.

We should never show our frustration on others because it is like you throw stone in water and it keeps producing repells, each repel is the new person who is frustrated because of the frustrated person among the group or family.

What can I do to control my frustration, learn from your errors take feedback from people about your behavior and improve yourself, never become  a person who likes loneliness, first understand yourself before trying to find holes in others shoes.

Never break the bonds with your family and siblings, if you want to know why? Ask people who are in  rehabilitation centers  for  societal syndromes they will tell you why. The paradox a person will never understand that he made a mistake until it happens to him, but a wise person will learn from his ow mistakes and will try not to repeat it and that is you are first step to avoid frustration, because every time you fail you are boosted with a dose of neural signals which wants you to fight to win the problem which is completely a natural process.

Lastly happiness is a wave is same as the frustration wave but it repells even faster than the latter and does the most wonderful things it makes a person smile.

So choose the wave you want to surf on.

Thanks a lot for your time .Hope you liked this short story. 

ESC- To Quit?

Hello readers

Hope you are doing well.

If you are always worried about your future and consult a palmist, remember people without hands do make their own future.

-Anonymous

“Get busy living or get busy dying, that's God damn truth”  from the box office hit Shawshank redemption.

Actually one of my friends Jiga  from the Indian Institute of Bombay asked me to write a passage on this sensitive and important topic, ESC- to quit is about the reason people commit suicide and lose their precious lives and an effort to  build awareness to eradicate this mental disease. 

So why do some people take that extreme step and stop breathing forever. We need to understand that whatever happens in life there will always be a way out so simply ending that life is not wise.

We are designed to live not to die an untimely and an unnatural death.

You know the sad part is that these days someone dying especially suicides has become a news column in almost all the leading newspapers recently I read an article that shook me! It was about a bureaucrat's wife and daughter committing suicide because her husband or the girl's father was charged with corruption. Even if you logically think about it, the kid’s dad or that lady’s husband was at fault, OK let me give them the benefit of doubt saying it was shame and the fear to face the media or their own people, but how does it match to end their lives?

People have seriously forgotten how important is there life and they should be fortunate today that they are alive and living.

It is so pathetic to hear news like a 10 year girl or a boy committed suicide, because her mom scolded her, her teacher scolded her! She failed in math test! I mean is that even a reason?

I was just checking the statistics on the net it shows that people from the age group as young as 10 till the adult age of 30 have higher affinity to end their life for reasons like academic issues, financial issues, disappointment , school bullying, for not getting their desired women failing in an exam the list is almost endless.

Let’s be honest how many of us have got this horrible thought? I can truthfully say that I have not got such thoughts which I am happy about, may be sometimes in frustration I could have just blabber some statements but that would be a stress buster and you know no one means that and it was completely involuntary and came out as an emotional reflex.

Dear people please understand you being born as human the crown of evolution is itself a boon, do not just give it up for what so ever reason, I am sure there would be a way out, just think how much you can before you think something which is meaningless .

Some Suggestions.

I would like the teachers in schools to build more awareness among the students about importance of life other than the subjects they teach.

Students or rather children should be thought almost everything positive in their learning phase of life that is until their high school and beyond it,

Movies which involve mentally disturbing scenes should be filtered out, because this is an era where people get influenced by movies.

The grown-ups I think there is nothing much to tell you, you guys need to live a careful life rather pushing the escape button, thinks about your family and friends whenever you get such thoughts.

Students  in IITs’ and the IIMs’ in India and all the other great students in  the world’s best schools there is absolutely reason you should be part of this cowardly act, because we the kids of the normal schools consider you as role-models !

There is so much for you to do to improve yourself, to improve the world and improve the people around you, so what is the fun of quitting your life, are you assured you are going get another life instantaneously? Do you think this is a Mario game?

To be frank with you I do not usually pity the people who kill themselves until and unless there is such a strong reason that his or her life has become unlivable! you may feel I am being rude, but the fact is that we all have problems in life it just takes a little bit of effort to deal with it and I am tough on such people as I want to make them strong.

Please people always remember no one in this world has a right to hurt you and make you feel low, it is just the way you respond to a stimuli that matters.

Please spread this awareness too all the stressed out kids around you and motivate them and try to make them understand the joy of living. Let us try to spread this awareness as a team.

As I always say, Life is sweet living it.

I once again thank my friend for asking me to write this blog for a noble cause.

Thanks for your time, have a great weekend ahead.

Forewarn.

Hello readers

Hope you all are doing well

If you think everyone listens to you, either you are in an illusion or you are a shepherd

-Anonymous

We all city dwellers should be happy that this time the monsoons in India was a good success, thanks to mother nature it is like the heart for the agriculturists here.It also recharges the ground water which is very essential as we are exploiting the water table without checks and balances.

Well after that short discussion about the monsoon. We can get started with the main discussion today.

I am sure we all have quarreled or had arguments with family, friends, at work and so on.

When you analyze this word argument it comes from the Latin word argūtāre meaning, to prove, assert, accuse.

There is a difference between a fight and an argument which we all understand, fight is you will have a physical episode with a person with or without weapons, and from ancient times it has evolved from the roots of nature for various reasons like survival, dominance and so on.

But argument according to habitat biologists is present only  in the human community.

How many of us have ended up situations where you know what is exactly going wrong with a person, for example he is working on some project and you know that there is a work around available to get it done easily.

But the issue is either you do not know the understandable method to communicate it to him or the other person is too stubborn or resistant to listing to anyone for that matter.

Well if you ask me if this situation is seen often or is it too rare, I can tell you that this is one of the biggest purposes of communication and it is only because of this situation man evolved in this world intellectually.

A communication is a process which involves the people in question the sender and receiver in between these two you have the process of encoding and decoding the message.

In the process of encoding and decoding you also will see the clause of agreement and disagreement.

So when we come back to our question why is it difficult to convince someone?

I think it is a very critical psychological process at the first stage and in the second stage moves to the ego department of our mind, those who believe in soul, which I believe in depends on it too for the competition of one conversation in a fruitful manner.

So there is no reason that the adviser who has delivered the message with all good spirits regret that the receiver did not heed his advice.

It is all pre-programmed without your awareness to be frank.

The receiver has to only encode the message and understand it with a matured soul, so that he will get that good spirited message.

I conclude by saying there is no point arguing or ending a conversation with a disagreement with anyone, because as the conversation progresses your subconscious already knows the end result.

There are people who also a conversation provocative and contend needlessly just for personal joy, never heed your ears to such people.

So guys relax and leave people to experience the joy of hard experiences so that your advice and their learning from that experience finally converge at a point after some point of time which will give rise to the sun of realization and show the right direction to that person who was roaming in darkness of ego and ignorance.

Thanks for your time. Good day.

Vehemence

Hello readers

Hope you all are doing well.

Kind words are short and easy to speak, but the echoes are truly endless.

-Mother Teresa.

Thank god it is a Friday! Well that is the slogan trending everywhere, especially for the people who are in the corporate cycle, I am also one among them and I can tell you for me now almost all the days are becoming similar, so I guess I have become used to it.

Each one us are built differently, some are eccentric some are conventional others are just mellow, some are over emotional, collectively we call it emotions.

Does our  emotions drive us actually the they do, like an year ago I watched a documentary in the famous infotainment channel national geographic about why we swear at people when we see people driving recklessly on roads. The explanation given was, driving is treated as a complex task by the brain and the whole neural network.

All the systems like the neural response system the external receptive system, the conscious and sub-conscious are in their most efficient mode during a drive. So if a car next to you suddenly over-took from the wrong side we tend to swear on him as the whole system of the body works on instincts which is directly linked to an emotional reaction that is the reason we react so sharply at times.

We have always been told by teachers our advisers to control our emotions.

But the big question is,  are we able to control emotions? Most of us would answer in the following way: we control emotions wherever required and after certain age in a person’s life. Well I too agree with that. We still see people who lose emotions end up breaking down or crying or fuming with anger.

Well it is not important to know why it happens but we must understand crying for no reason or losing your temper for silly things around you seriously will not work out.

The reason why I am saying that unnecessary break down and bursting out of emotions have lost its value over time! The simple example would be the cinema, you see the same actor in different movies, and he or she wears a character that involves showing the audience all the usual emotions, first on the list would be laughing and crying and so on.

When we watch a movie if there is scene which involves crying, we hardly take it seriously as you know it is part of the act, but we would have watched some people next to you would be crying profusely for a reasonable amount of time.

Have we ever thought why does it happen with some of us?

Recently a sampling analysis was conducted in America, and a group of 25 people were sent to a movie which has an equal amount of sorrow, happiness and disappointment. So after the movie behavioral scientists observed the videos of the audience watching the movies which were recorded using a closed circuit camera. Out of the 25, fifteen people were in deep sorrow when the lead actor was in trouble. The remaining 10 just showed body language and continued to watch the movie with ease.

So the scientists, concluded the people who were weeping, involved themselves so much in the movie that the illusion turned out to be a reality for them.

The scientists just ran through the daily activities of these people just to find out if they were emotionally stressed at their homes, the answer turned out it be an yes. So the scientists coined the term called as ‘Reserve emotions’.

Reserve emotions are, when you relate your current situation to someone else’s situation and feel helpless about it and react in the same way that other person is doing.

Well there ends the study, and the inference of that study is don’t be over emotional in life. We should all control our emotions, I am not telling you to become a wooden log emotions are very important to us, but only in the right spirit.

We must all enjoy the tiny cheerful lives that we have been gifted by God, instead of always cribbing and crying for the things which we don’t have.

There are people in this world who don’t know what is love, what is proper food and so on , so let’s try to improve that and thank our stars that we are better off.Remember useless arguments and emotional break down is just a trick played by your mind, don't fall for it.

All the best for your journey of life, and thanks for your time.

Automobile.

Hello readers

Hope you all are doing great.

You have to be willing to be misunderstood, if you are willing to innovate.

-Jeff Bezos, CEO Amazon.

Precise is a word which can be used only when we are sure of something and there things around us which work in precision.

I would like to take the example of a an automobile, every automobile designed has come precise dimensions and credentials which is accurate to the last decimal point, and the average performance of the car or any automobile is already briefed by the manufacturer, so that the customer Is sure of what is buying.

Now coming to the driving of the automobile, it also requires precision because, one small diversion or a twitch from the steering wheel may lead to mishap.

Precision is very much important in our lives talking on generic sense always doesn’t work out for us and we all will be in soup, when that one guy in the room who is seriously knowledgeable will see us talking will either walk away or ask us the questions and we end up poker faced as we don’t know the answers.

SO better we know something completely or find out because half-baked knowledge doesn’t take us anywhere.

I think generation lacks complete knowledge from academics to what not which is not a good sign, because in future as the older generations will be replaced by us we would be in responsible for taking up important positions in the country, we all need to aim high.

When we drive we are always precise why not apply the principle when we learn and teach?

Think about it.

Thanks for your time.